I have been feeling very overwhelmed by things these days. I feel like everything is going wrong at once, or just not going the way I planned. Yesterday started off bad and only got worse and then spilled over to today.
I woke up late and was frustrated because John wasn't coming to get me and we were late to church (which annoys me) and when he did come and get me, we argued about whether or not he could buy cleats for playing frisbee and football. Then I was really pissed off about the way our lunch turned out. I thought it was going to be this nice lunch with the Aaron and everyone else that was there and instead it turned into work. I really annoyed by some people and the comments they were making. I guess I just had a different agenda for the lunch meeting than others.
When we got home after lunch, I went into the bedroom to open the windows and found a large layer of mold all around our bedroom window; less than 2 feet from my bed. I was livid, to the point of trying to find out how we could withhold our rent until they fixed the problem. It turns out, I think we are pretty much liable, which is retarded because our apartment is not ventilated well and it is almost impossible to keep it aired out enough to stop the mold. AARRGGGHHH! So John and I started thinking of our options and that just got me all worked up. I really don't want to move again, but I want to be healthy and in a home that is safe.
Then every little thing started to pile on and make me more frustrated. Our printer won't scan anymore, our dishwasher was leaking water (but it wasn't even on), I installed the printer wrong and now it is really messed up, John isn't motivated to do his homework and our apartment was in shambles with crap everywhere. I just wanted to scream.
What should we do? Do we move or stay where we are because it is cheap and we don't pay utilities? Isn't my health more important than money? If we move, should we upgrade to a 2 bedroom in case we ever decide to have a baby? Can we afford a different apartment?
These are my questions running through my brain and distracting me from work. Please pray for guidance and wisdom for John and I.
Monday, January 28, 2008
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